Feelings

Things have changed a lot since I last wrote here. Feelings, people, routines. Does anything stays nowadays? It's sad to know someone, to be with them and show yourself to them and they just end up taking you so lightly. Suddenly you just have to change everything because things change. There's no point holding on to something that's not there anymore but why do we do it still? Why do we hold on to things that has changed? Simple, the feelings.

We always remember what people make us feel. Whether they are the good ones or the bad ones. People don't remember the things you gave them, the effort you've put in or all the things you've done for them. People will remember if you hurt them. Why? Pain lasts longer. It takes a longer time to heal because the impact is bigger. It's so easy to forget the happy things when all you feel is pain. Pain clouds your mind. It blocks away the rationality in you.

So, I guess what I'm trying to tell myself and everyone else is if someone can't love you as much as you do, it's not because you haven't done enough. I am 100% sure that you have done more than you should. It's because they are dealing with their own pain too. Pain from the past or pain that is not fully healed. They'll do anything and everything to cure themselves, even hurting you. They are not capable of showing their feelings because they are scared and it is never because you are not good enough. Trust me, it is not your fault. To love is not wrong.

However, some people can just love selflessly while some people let their pain limit their love. Who wants to feel pain anyway? We are all fear of pain somehow and that's where the doubts, the anxieties, the dark side takes over. We all have thick walls to protect ourselves. But deep down, everyone just wants someone who they can bare their soul to. Someone who loves you even when you are not very lovable. Someone who remembers the real you when your demons gets in the way . Yes, all of us deserve that someone.

It's okay to be scared and unsure but never let anything stop you from spreading all the good things in life. Love, compassion and kindness. It's all we have in this cruel world. It's all we have.